Impostor Syndrome

As a living person, I can say that I get this a lot. If you are not sure what it means, look it up. Jokes, it technically means that you feel as though you aren’t qualified enough, or don’t deserve to be in the position you are in. Or at least that’s what I know it as. I never know what that feeling was until last year when someone said how they felt and they were like ‘well, that’s impostor syndrome for ya’. I want to post about this because I want others to know that there is a name for what they feel, others feel it, and it’s OK.

Lets start with a wee story time of when I have felt impostor syndrome. To be honest, it is all the time, but that is way too long of a story. For one, I felt it when I went to high school. Even though I did a literal test to get in and they could only select a certain amount, I got in. Even though I did well on those tests, I still felt like it wasn’t good enough. I would ask around and other people in my new school got 2 or 3 more points than me and I don’t know why but I felt as though me being there was a mistake and as though I was going to be discovered at some point, so I tried to earn my place. I got good grades and worked hard in class. But still that didn’t go away. Not until a few years after, when nobody came to kick me out of school. I mean I got the grades to go in but I still felt as though I was taking someone else’s place, but I wasn’t. I felt like the only reason I got in was because my sister’s got in, but it wasn’t. Sometimes I still feel that way in school but I just accept it really, this is where I am and it doesn’t matter how I got here I suppose.

Now lets get a story about a famous person who felt that way. You really aren’t gonna believe me when I say this but Emma Watson (yes THE Emma Watson) felt impostor syndrome when she went to an arena full of feminists. I know it sounds crazy but it’s true. I am pretty sure that it was one of her first talks in this area but in an interview I heard that when she got in and was talking to other feminists, she felt as though she didn’t belong there, in that crowd with other people who had talked to crowds about the matter. But now look where she is. She is on stages everywhere talking about equal rights. How crazy is that, to know that she once felt like she wasn’t meant to be in that hall with all the influential speakers, and is now one herself. Imagine if she gave into that and left the arena. When I think of the word ‘feminism’ or ‘equality’ I instantly think of her. It just shows how this happens to literally everyone, no matter your status or fame in the world. It is how you view yourself, almost as if all the faith you have in yourself is gone. It is OK to feel this way though, as long as you keep going and don’t give up.

It is weird though, isn’t it, how most of us feel as though we don’t belong. Even people who have completed their PHD in university, don’t believe they deserve to be in the place in life they are now. By the way, this isn’t me talking about Emma Watson, this is just people in general. But I literally have heard stories about smart people who feel this way. So I guess it goes to show that it doesn’t go away by learning new stuff. To be honest, I don’t know how it goes away. You just don’t think about it as much I guess.

I don’t know if this is impostor syndrome or not, but even when I went to talk to a councilor about my mental health, I didn’t really believe that I was ‘bad enough’ to get the treatment I was getting. I am not really sure if that is just denial or whatever, but it is true. I felt like I wasn’t as mentally ill as others so therefore I shouldn’t be getting helped. But I mean, that has gone away a bit now. I guess I just told you guys this because your brain can trick you into believing so many false things but yet you are here. You got where you are for someone reason. You probably deserve it and it is fate so I guess try to cherish the moments, be thankful and confident.

Thank you for reading this. Don’t forget to like, follow, and donate some change so that I can keep all of my content free for everyone. Also check the codes down below to find great discounts on awesome stores. Hope you have a great day, a great life, and remember, you are deserve the world and don’t let nobody tell you otherwise PERIODT.

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