The Most Annoying Thing In The World

For this post I am excluding all the annoying people, which is quite a lot, and just focusing on one thing. But I promise you that basically everyone reading this right now will understand. This thing can make or break your day. You either like it or despise it and in my experience, there is no in between and it can switch up so fast. What is this thing you may ask? Hair. Fucking hair. I know you all just nodded your head like “yup, this bitch is true” and if you think otherwise, let me educate you.

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I obviously can’t speak for everyone on this, but I am a girl with relatively long hair and a lifetime experience of hair failures. I would say there has been thousands of close calls where I was nearly going to just chop it off. That is how far it gets. And then there are people like Billie Eilish who come out looking like a goddess just like “hey” and we are all just in awe. How perfect. How beautiful! And then I am there looking at her photo while my hair looks like a birds nest that was attacked by a fox. It just isn’t fair. I’m just going to say that it’s because I’m broke compared to her. For me as well, if one hair is out of place, my whole day is ruined and it literally gives me so much anger because I can’t fix it and then I keep focusing on I and trying to make it work but in the process I make it so much worse.

You have to admit though, that the worst days are usually always bad hair days. I actually physically cannot wear my school scarf, no matter how freezing it is, because it makes my hair uncontrollable and uncomfortable. Fucking Mr Frost could be breathing down my neck and I would refuse to use it. That is how aggravating it is. It just makes everything so bad and although it is such a comfy scarf, it makes me so bloody angry and so you will either see me warm and grumpy, or frozen and… less grumpy. This is the same with my school hoodie that we also wear pretty much all year round because it is 1 degree below cold as fuck at all times. The hood is literally the bane of my existence and every other person with long hair will back me on this because it is so true. I have no clue what it is but it literally makes me so uncomfortable and no matter what I do with it, it doesn’t work. Even if I have my hair tied up in a ponytail, it would be annoying. Even if it was in plaits, it would be annoying. EVEN if you were having the best hair day of your entire life, guess what, it would be annoying. It is unfixable, not even the nurses wet paper towel can fix this.

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Does anyone else cry over there hair? If not, I am going to cancel my existence. But if you do, please comment down below because I feel like a crazy person. I have a heart of stone and don’t cry at many things (apart from my life that crumbles before my eyes and I have to watch as everything I love disappears and I become unstable), but this is the exception. I am going all out, on the floor, tears trippin’ me, screams, crying. It is so annoying and there is nobody that can fix it. And all I want to do is jump into bed and die, but sometimes my hair is annoying on the pillow too and I legit just look at it like “why the fuck are you following me you slimy, cling bitch! You ruin me”. Then I get a shower, if possible, and I feel as though I have destroyed the beast. Until I have to make the choice. Air dry, or blow dry. You see, air drying is good for your hair. No heat damage, you don’t have to sit holding the hairdryer for ages. But the next morning your hair is actually unbrushable and even if you can brush it, it explodes into a million different dimensions and you don’t know where to start. And with blow drying, you get it done and over with quickly, put a wee bit of heat protectant spray on, bish bash bosh your good to go. But my lanky arms can not be coping with it. It takes so long to do it and you have this constant racket blasting in your ear and you start to literally sweat because it is so warm and you wish you never even had the shower. And sometimes that can go all tatty too. So there really is no way around it. I usually just go for the wee, air dry in 2 plaits type of thing because it doesn’t get tangled, it is cute and easy if you know how to do it. It is a bit of an arm workout too, but like it’s ok. Then later on you take them out and your hair is curly. But whatever you do, never EVER brush your hair after you had them in plaits. I warned you.

Moral of the story is, if you see me or anyone else having a bad hair day, stay the fuck away because you will either get trapped in our hair for the rest of your life, or you will get the beating of your life. And there is no in-between bitch. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT


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