Have You Amber Heard About This?

It comes as no shock that there is currently a trial between Johnny Depp and Amber Heard. Just to clear things up, Amber Heard is an actor… mostly. But for real I have never seen or heard of her ever before. I’m pretty sure Johnny said she was on Aquaman or something. All you need to know is that she is quite literally an extreme narcissist and complete nuts. Oh, and her lawyers have just graduated from clown school or the equivalent. Now, I’m just gonna run into this now because I got a lot to say and I’m just gonna ramble on so try to keep up, OK?

Let’s start with the basics. What is the case about? It’s a defamation case which basically means that Johnny Depp is suing Amber for ruining his image which in turn ruins his career because he is obviously a public figure. How did he ruin his image? Well, she posted (or didn’t… she can’t quite remember what her script said) an op-ed basically outing Johnny Depp as abusive. She has evidence to prove this… kind of, but she also forgot to mention that she too is physically abusive. And it doesn’t really take a fucking genius to realize that. So now it’s turned into a whole thing about who was the most abusive, who should be punished, who didn’t clean the carpet blah blah blah.

It’s quite hilarious though and I recommend you try to watch it. Skip to the part where she is on the stand though because then you’ll understand me when I say there is no way she could possibly have been a paid actor. Even I could do a better job and I was one step above being a rock in my primary school play. But you’ll never guess the drama! This actually nearly brought a tear to my eye… sorry, I meant it nearly made me tear my eyes out. Basically what happened was her dog stepped on a bee. Obviously, this is vital to her case… somehow, and was very emotional for her. At least that’s what I think her facial expression was supposed to show. I couldn’t really tell because I was trying to remember her point (there was none)

amber heard dog stepped on a bee face comedy meme

For real this is what her face looked like when she talked about her dog stepping on a bee. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a mess when it comes to dogs getting hurt, but like can we get to the fucking point, or remind me what the point is?! Please.

Hats off for the confidence I guess. She is very committed to the role. I mean they literally had a recording of her confessing to it and she sat there and denied it. Dead ass starred them in the eye and spoke literal shit. But we love Camille and she sees right through that shit. She just stand there looking all fed up with this shit and be like “Miss He- Miss- MISS HEARD… that wasn’t my question” and then goes back into game mode.

A reoccurring theme with Amber’s stories is that they don’t really… make any sense. One of the ones that made me crack up was the one where she said something along the lines of “he put his hand into a fist, raised it up, pulled it back *dramatic sigh* and HEAD-BUTTED me”. I’m sorry but that really did not make any sense.

Something that has really started to bug literally the entire population is the fact that whenever she answers a question she whips her head over to the jury like they are her moral support and answers to them. It kinda gives me the vibes of when you go to the doctor with your mum and the doctor asks you a question but you look at your mum to answer instead. That is quite literally it. And I don’t know if she got neck problems or what but she gotta get that checked out soon. I’m surprised Camille hasn’t called her out and been like “Can you look at me when you are answering me bitch”. That would have been me for real.

Also, she is such a poser. This is indisputable as well, even Amber Heard’s lawyers could win my case. She got a tissue to wipe her nose and she went to put it down but then saw a camera man pointed in her direction so she put it back up to her nose froze for a second until it flashed and then went on. It’s like ma’am this is on live broadcast and we can see past your bullshit

I’m gonna have to admit something and don’t be angry about it because you know it’s true, but I don’t think either of them were perfect partners. I don’t think he did what Amber said he did, I don’t think he was physically abusive, but they definitely just weren’t good for each other. Don’t twist my words OK because I’m as Team JD as I am a human, but he isn’t an angel.

I don’t want to drag this on for too long tbh because I’m gonna leave you a link to the actual trial video yourself but I’ll leave you with one last thing that made me actually die. Funny enough it was when they were leaving the court for the day and Amber was getting off the stand and as she got off, Johnny started to walk out too. Let me tell you, this how jumped back like it was extreme hopscotch. For real she acted as though JD was about to pounce. But he just needed to get to the door. What was also funny was that the police woman who was there reacted like that pick me girl in school who would go in between the two fighting and spread her arms out like “Guys stawp it this isn’t you! Don’t do this pleeasssee”. I guess it’s her job but I thought it was quite hilarious

Anyways, I love to talk about this shit because it’s so messed up but like also I feel bad for the guy. Do leave a wee comment though on what you think because I need to make sure all my subscribers are on my side. I’m trying to post more often now as well so scroll down to the suscribe section below so you can get notified every time I post because trust me you don’t want to miss it. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT


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