The answer is no, but it is also a bit more complicated than that. Do I like the first day of school where everything is new, you get the new time tables, new classes, new teachers? Yes, you could say that. But in general, I really could not be arsed to go back. Lately when I talk to my friends, they are all like “yeah I think I am ready to go back to school though and I’m ready to go back to normal school life and work”. And I’m just here like “yeah totally” but in reality I just don’t want to go back. Especially as we’ll have to do those shitty tests they make you do that really make no fucking sense. Like how do they test your smartness based of whether or not you know how many holes there will be in a folded piece of paper. Like it really is a load of shite. If I was a teacher and saw that someone couldn’t mentally fold a page into a swan or some shit, I wouldn’t be thinking he was dumb, I would think he has more important things to understand, and surprisingly origami isn’t one of them.
I don’t know if my friends are a bunch of NERDS (jokes I love them) but they are prepared and talking about how they want to go back because we have been off so long and I just join in because I don’t want to be that one bitch that goes “I actually couldn’t give a shit if I were to never go back to school. Like I’m done with this hoe and I don’t want to start” because they would disown me. I think I’ll just go because I have nothing else to do and I don’t want to end up living at my parents house for the rest of my life and become the creepy auntie who is always way too drunk and getting way too close for comfort. And I always try to come up with these money making plans and they never turn out the way I want. I do keep going with them too be honest. I mean this blog was one of the attempts, but it is what it is and maybe some day I can drop out of school and do my own thing.
I’m going into lower 6th, which is the second last year of high school, so it is the first voluntary year of school. So technically I don’t have to be there. I don’t really know what that is gonna do for my motivation because it could kinda be one of those situations where you are excited to do something but then when someone tells you to do it, you turn into a stubborn bitch and don’t want to do it anymore. Or maybe I just won’t try because there is no pressure of me having to go there. The one perk though is that we get a separate we area in the school that only the 6th years can go into because we are obviously the elite. And now we can be the intimidating ones that tower over all the first years and are best mates with all the teachers. Well, maybe not that last point because I am still socially awkward.
We also only have to do 3 or 4 classes now which is good but I feel like it will still be just as much work and that makes me want to die. I picked 4 classes (chem, geo, business studies and Spanish) but I’m planning to drop one in the first month or so. It’s a good plan like so that if I find I don’t like one, most likely chemistry, I can drop it and not have to worry about it. But at the moment I can’t be arsed doing any and I’m scared I’m gonna hate them all or maybe drop the wrong one. It’s a possibility. And the first timetable I have won’t have as many study breaks and that might freak me out, but it will be fine right. It’s also gonna be so scary to tell a teacher that I want to leave their class. Like I don’t need to say it to them, but leaving implies I don’t like what they have devoted their life to. Likes like the biggest insult of all time. I am also shitting myself for the smaller classes. My Spanish class will defo be small and that is so scary because I will have to answer more and I can’t just hide in the back. What if everyone there is fucking annoying and I just have to vibe there for the next 2 years. What if we are the boring class that they hate to teach? What if I turn out to be shite at the subject?
Maybe living in my parents house forever isn’t all that bad. Maybe I can be the fun drunk aunt who always buys the alcohol, takes you shopping, gives the best advice and shouts at your parents for doing anything other than worship us. Sounds fun like. Maybe if this blog blows up I could also just leave school but I won’t put that pressure on you guys lol. Anyways, I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT.
So I would like to preface that I am a 16 year old who had a part-time job so obviously if you are like a mum of 5 or something and you are thinking about quitting, I would think it through a lot more than what I am going to mention but like just for … Continue reading I Quit…Was It A Big Mistake?
You know. I’m not going to start slabbering about this hoe about the fact she might be listening to us, although I have a few creepy stories about that, or the fact she might be taking our personal information, because I mean why the fuck would anyone want to know that. Today I’m gonna talk … Continue reading Alexa | Let’s Discuss It
See, I don’t really like it when people are cheeky to me. I mean you can be upfront and shout at me and I’ll be fine with that. My sisters have conditioned me to that. But if you are being passive aggressive or cheeky in front of me or behind my back, I won’t hesitate … Continue reading I’m not above a fight
I feel like a lot of people will understand me when I say that there are things that people can literally just talk about and that makes you feel exhausted or just unmotivated to do that thing despite the fact you aren’t even going to do it but the thought of it is so horrible you want to cry? That is a bit of a weird introduction but you know what I mean, right? Like if someone was like “oh my god do you remember that time you went kayaking for ages and your arms and legs and everything were exhausted and then you had to do a 10K walk afterwards?” By the way, that was targeted at my dad and I am still mentally recovering from it. But whenever I remember that it is as if I get PTSD from it and literally get so scared at the thought that I did that. I don’t really know where I am going with this intro but I am going to stop now and we can start talking about things that make me physically and mentally fed up.
As a white family, we did some messed up shit. Like that might sound racist but I have seen videos of POC who are like “white people are messed up” and I agree with that because my family just be going outside in the middle of nowhere to shit in a fucking forest and sleep with the bloody insects. We used to do this a lot and I guess it was fun with my friends but like now that I have half a brain and am not made to enjoy things, I really do hate camping. I’m sorry but I just don’t see the point. You gotta pack and carry a bunch of shit and bring in to the middle of nowhere or go to a cramped site with a bunch of kids screaming and people being actually active and going on walks at like 5 in the morning and, while there are toilets, they are so stinking I feel like I contracted 10 diseases just by washing my hands. To be fair, I don’t mind if I set up a tent in my back garden, but if you expect me to bring fucking sleeping bags and a fire starter, I will in fact run away. So I can not be bothered to go camping. I would prefer to look at the stars from the comfort of my bed, looking through the window or standing outside for a sec while the kettle is on thank you very much.
I’m sorry but we need to normalise going straight to the deep stuff. And that doesn’t mean “what is your star sign” because at that point I would walk away, but I mean instead of being like “the weather is crap today isn’t it lol”, why can’t we just be like “What is your favorite childhood memory”. I know that sounds creepy as fuck and I definitely wouldn’t just go up to someone and say that, but like I hate small talk. It is so cringey and awkward and it very rarely leads to anything. We can hardly go like “yeah the weather is crap, but do you know what else is crap? The cats movie” and then go off on a whole tangent because to me it seems desperate. It is also awkward starting off small talk. I know it is kinda just to fill in the awkward silence but I honestly hate starting a small talk convo because you just be like “sooo… how are you” like what the fuck is that.
Raising a Child
To be fair, I am a wee bit away from this happening to me… I hope, and my mind will probably change but does it not sound so scary to have to push a fucking human out and then one day they just kick you out of hospital and you and whoever your partner is are just standing like, what the fuck do we do now. This is the start of their fucking life. There isn’t a big change in the world, sparkles and rainbows don’t magically appear. You have to somehow understand what the baby wants by its crying, unless you are one of those people who can somehow communicate with babies or whatever harry potter, 6th sense, fairy-tale shit you have. And I’m really sorry if I am freaking out some pregnant person out there, I am sure you will be great, but like it could not be me. You need to make sure they are fed, they are breathing, they sleep, they shit everywhere, they get bored, they cry, they live. They are a freaking tiny human and you are making up a personality and a life for this baby. It sounds awesome but like what if they turn out like a prick. What if your child is a prick or just really annoying and creepy and now you have a literal annoying person living with you and if you say anything, they turn into rebellious teens and you are just waiting until they turn 18 but that is a long fucking time. But yeah, good luck to all the parents aren’t there. At least society takes most of the blame for how mentally fucked they have become 🙂
Not Wearing Face Masks
Despite the fact a lot of people are so dramatic with face masks and literally complain every second about how they “can’t breathe” or “this is so uncomfortable”, I kinda am going to be screwed when we don’t have to wear them anymore because I do weird things with my mouth when my mask is on. I have a habit of doing that weird awkward smile all the time or just sticking my tongue out a wee tiny bit for absolutely no reason and also making tiny noises, but when I take it off I will have to remember that people can see my face and the weird shit I do with it and sometimes I can be quite expressive so what if in school someone I hate is talking shit and I just look at them with disgust and then see that I am silently judging them! I defo will be exposed but I think I’m ready for it. I don’t know why but I always feel ready to throw hands at an annoying person if I needed to or just talk shit for a straight hour. Maybe if it leads to that, I can get some of my anger out and it will get better, yay! Watch me look at everyone with a rude face and start fights everywhere lmao.
Working In The Hospital
I was gonna say working as a doctor, but I feel like it doesn’t give the other’s justice because I don’t think I could do any of their jobs. Like, when I was at hospital, the nurses were always so lovely and kind even though they had 10 old people arguing about the TV, 5 kids throwing up, 3 doctors ordering them to do things at a time and a partridge in a pear tree. They really do the most and are still happy but I cry if I burn my toast in the morning. That is a different type of hurt though. I am also watching grey’s anatomy at the moment and, firstly it is awesome, but secondly, what the actual fuck. They just all seem to know everything. This guy could come in and cough once and they would be like “oh my god he has supercalifragilisticfeefifofumI’mgettingrippedtonight. And then they know how to fix it. How do they remember all that! Seriously though can any medical person please say how you know it all instantly and stay calm when you have to save people from near death and you know every detail and name of things. It couldn’t be me. I would get stuck on how to pronounce a word and then not realise my patient is literally having a seizure right next to me. I respect you guys honestly. I also want to know if you actually do literal 48 hour shifts! Is that not literally kinda bad for you and also having to diagnose people. Do you not just cry at every single patient you see. Could not be me but thank you for volunteering as tribute *wistles*
Anyways, that’s all I can be bothered with today in all honesty. Here’s a bonus. Can I be bothered to do more? No, so yeah. But please do comment below if you have anything else to add, I always love seeing what you have to say, and make sure to like and follow for more. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT.
I haven’t posted in a while, obviously, and I ain’t gonna explain why because it’s more boring than you think. It’s not like I went on a fucking trip to the Bahamas despite the fact I hope to go there some day if corona ever goes away. But anyways, a lot has happened like me … Continue reading Train wreck of thought
Now, I can’t really talk for the guys on this topic because, being a girl, I have never been to a guys sleepover and no matter how old I am, my mother will never ever let me go to one. So if this is different for guys, if you even play sleepover games, do please … Continue reading Sleepover Games Are Sh!t | Let’s Discuss It
First of all, to the people who are in the comments right now saying “It’s makeup and I, not makeup and me” literally take you Hermione Granger ass outside or “I” will personally make Jeff Bezos land his fucking dick rocket on you. I mean would you slate Marley and Me for the grammar issue? … Continue reading Makeup and Me
Hey guys. So this week has been a very “what the fuck” week if you get me. Like there are a lot of moments where I have been asking myself “what is even the point lol”. NO, I don’t mean that in a mentally ill kinda way, but like when I am told to do things or I see someone doing something, I am just wondering why the fuck I would do it
Do I really need to say anymore? I mean why the hell would I be like “on my time on this earth, I will only feel proud when I can run a fucking long distance”. Bitch what sort of trauma do you have because that isn’t sane people shit. Like I am sorry but why would you want to. You would get so bloody bored as well. So you are sore, tired and bored, I go through that all on a regular bases anyways, so I don’t really see the need to run to get those things. I mean I suppose I could see if it is for a charity, but like Mo Farah and other Olympian people literally do it as a warm up or something. I used to run and do 5k but that shit was so boring and I hated every second of it. To any runners out there, are you ok?
I just know that my friends are reading this like “will this bitch ever let it go” because we are making a bucket list of things to do during summer and a couple of them were like absolutely, camping is such a great idea, and me and others are like “but why”. But like seriously, this needs talked about. Why would I willing sleep outside, in the cold, where there is no body that can hear me scream, no help near, I have to piss in the woods, sleep with insects, get all smelly, have to carry a bunch of things there and back, not have a very nice meal, literally be kidnapped etc. When I could literally be warm in my bed, watching a movie, hear the rain from the comfort of my house, no insects, have nice food, not have to carry anything anywhere, relax, piss in an actual toilet, and have less chance of being murdered in my sleep. Like give me a reason why camping sounds better? There argument was that it is an adventure and unique, but bitch the only thing making it unique is that you won’t be able to do it again because you are dead. Like… And it is hardly like you are going to do anything groundbreaking when you get there. Like you are hardly going to set up a tent on top of dinosaur bones, or right next to a top-secret Russian spy base. Like we live in Northern Ireland. The most you are going to find is an empty Guinness can.
I am definitely not mentioning this just because I never have a chance with going out with anyone, so don’t get that idea in your head But in all seriousness, are you telling me I have to pay attention and talk to them on a regular bases and leave my house? I don’t do that with my friends so why would a man be any difference? I have been in a relationship once and, maybe it was just the guy, but it really ain’t all roses and kisses. Like it is tiring as fuck. Maybe if you find an actual nice person, but like other than that I could not be bothered. I really have lost all faith in men at the moment so maybe I am biased. But at the moment I am fine with just living in my shell, only talking to people when I have an ounce of sanity, and having no real responsibility to go out with people and be interesting. lol
The Responsibilities of Being Famous
I am not gonna lie. I feel like it would be cool to be famous and have a bunch of people who know you and actually like you, but then you hear so many stories and then I am like “ok maybe no”. Like they have to go to award ceremonies, talk to people, act happy all the time, always say the right thing, always have to post and be active on social media and things like that. They all have really busy lifestyles, and for me productive day is having a shower. Like maybe I am just having a mental breakdown, but surely they have them too and they still need to keep on doing so many things. Maybe it is worth it, I will never really know that, but like do they ever just get a day to stay at home and do literally nothing?
Being a Mum
So this one might be a controversial, might get on some people’s nerves, but like if it does you are probably a misogynistic twat so… But what I mean is that, I would like to have children and be a mum, but it is the things you have to do as a mum that gets me. Not even the dirty nappy’s or the no sleep part, but the fact that I feel as though mums are still the people doing all the house work. At least it is like that in my family. My mum has a job, like my dad, but she does more work in the office, at home, does the dishes, makes the dinner, cleans, brings us to and from school, the laundry, literally everything. I am not sure if it is like that for all people but it is for me and although I try to help out, I can’t do enough to help her. My dad just works and does the dishes/makes dinner whenever he actually has to. The reason I said this might be a bit controversial is because some people will definitely say “oh well women are supposed to be in the kitchen. They are supposed to do those jobs” and I am not saying all of these things should be put onto men, but like why can’t it be equal work for both of us. I don’t want to become a mum if it means it will turn into the traditional gender roles in society, you know.
Lol anyways, this is kinda what I think about sometimes. It really got a bit deep at the end there didn’t it but like oh well. Please like, comment and subscribe if you enjoyed this type of content. I think it is a wee bit of a laugh and I enjoy it. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT