Do You Know What’s Weird? Sleeping

Right, hear me out guys. This may sound like utter shite but I swear when you think about it for long enough, it literally makes no fucking sense, or well, at least it is such an amazingly weird thing. There is just a time of day where you could walk down the street and everyone around you, in their houses of course, is sleeping. Like nobody is awake at that moment. The world quite literally shuts down. The lights go out, we are pretty much unconscious, everything is closed except for clubs and really sketchy areas. But it is so weird that half of the world is like “ok, i’m done” and that is relatable as fuck, but again, what the actual hell. And then sleeping itself is a whole thing. I mean we just lie on this cuboid of feathers or cotton and shut our eyes for however long it takes to fall asleep and then BAM you are awake and literally 8 hours have passed (if you’re lucky) and we just act as though that is normal. And it is such a vulnerable moment as well. We are literally lifeless, our eyes closed, and we just vibe as though nobody could break into our house and just stab us or something. Sorry if that gave anyone anxiety, you would wake up in time don’t worry :/

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But what is it with sleeping. Like why is it that we have to literally sleep in the dark and get all comfy in a bed and shit, while animals literally have to sleep in shit and the cold and they just vibe. Yes you could say they have fur but like we have clothes and we still have to have a bloody sun in our room to fall asleep. To be honest, I would be so raging if I was an animal and couldn’t sleep under a blanket. I would have to become one of those dogs you see on tiktok that are so cute and literally wrap themselves up in their blanket and you realise how dumb your dog actually is because they literally walk into a glass window even if it is all smudgy 😐 But imagine how scary it would be if you were like the first living thing on earth and it was getting dark and you were with your mates and all of a sudden you were like “bro bro BRO I can’t keep my eyes open” and they were like “bro what?!” and you were like “my eyelids are like heavy or something bro! I’m seeing darkness and shit”. “Bro that’s so cra… OH SHIT BRO my eyes are heavy too!” and then you be screaming and you and your friend just conk out and in the morning you are like “shit bro! It’s bright again. My eyes aren’t even heavy? Bro, are we… dead” and your friend is like “I don’t know bro, but then again I am literally just a cell so… I mean I didn’t even know we had eyes until a couple of hours ago”. The end. I really have no clue what these stories even are. I mean what the even fuck. Please do say if I am going too far but like, I don’t give a shit so.

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Back on topic though. Our body has literally evolved to be like “ok so we kinda need to not work for a couple of hours, but like, we will also be working even harder than usual if that’s ok with you” and we just accept it like “yeah I trust you to keep me alive while I literally have no control over anything” and then our body is like “nice! As a thank you we are going to give you magical stories during the night that will make your actual life seem like actual shit and you will be depressed that it is gone. But if we accidentally give you a good one, we will delete it from your memory in a split second. Thanks again.” and we just like “that doesn’t sound fun at all actually. Maybe I should just stay up because I mean you still work when I am asleep anyways so…” and then our body is like “bitch Imma give you a headache if you don’t go to bed ok! And I’m going to make you feel so tired that you won’t be able to do nothing else BITCH”. Like it’s weird but like ok. And I know that there is all kinds of science behind sleeping and why we do it, but if we just forget science for a teeny tiny moment and just have a teeny tiny existential crisis, sleeping is so confusing and crazy.

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Then there are the people who feel like they are literal Jesus or something and they go frolicking around saying “I don’t even need sleep man. It’s just a ploy that mattress companies put in our head. I mean I haven’t slept in like 3 days man and look at me, I’m toooottaaallly fine dude *looks like an old sac of skin with some no life behind his eyes* America is the land of the free do I don’t even have to listen to all that science shit you know” and these people are also always anti-maskers and anti-vax people who think they are revolutionary but are really just paranoid and self-conscious. Can’t you die from a lack of sleep though? I mean it sounds quite dramatic if you ask me. You seriously are about to just shut down because I wouldn’t close my eyes for a few hours, what are you? A baby. I mean come on. And also one last thing that I am completely pissed about everyday. Why the hell am I still tired after sleeping?! Was that not enough for you body because it seems like you be needing a lot of shit these days. You need sleep, you need exercise, you need fed, you need sun, you need water, you need rest, you need washed, you need every fucking thing in the world and you know what? I’m sick of it to be quite frank with you.

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LOL anyways that was quite the rant today wasn’t it. I hope you are all have a great time during summer, or if you are still in school I hope you are coping ok. Surely it is nearly over right? Well depending on when you read this. Maybe you are some sort of galactic alien who randomly snatched a phone for some reason typed “do you know what is weird? Sleep” and if that is you, alien, give them their fucking phone back bitch. Cha anyways, I hope you have a good day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT


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Do You Know What’s Weird? Time

I would just like to say sorry for any existential crisis that might come from this post, so I warned you I guess. This one can go pretty deep if I do say so myself, but I am going to get started before it all goes through my head, but none of it actually on the screen, so yeah. Enjoy my mental breakdown.

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It’s funny how time is literally a social construct that somebody just made up one day. Like it must have been millions of years ago that a cave man was like “sdofhakganakljwfj” oh wait, let me translate that for you “hey bro, I kinda feel like we should measure the days” and the other one was like “why?” and then he was like “well, I dunno *kicks the ground awkwardly*. I just kinda think that making plans would be easier instead of just saying to meet at the dinosaur bones whenever this burning light in the sky is at the right hand side of the blue air. Every time I check I just go blind again”. And then boom, they just made time. But the thing is, time isn’t a real thing. Yes we know the definition but like time was made up. Seconds, minutes, hours, were just made by someone to make our lives more convenient. It is a bloody construct that the whole bloody world lives by and yet I have so many questions.

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First of all, how can some people think that time has gone by really quickly, while others think it moved so slowly. The same amount of time passed, but for some it was as if it was sped up, but in that same moment while someone thinks everything is going so fast, someone thinks it is going really slow, as if it was in slow-mo. And both happen at the same time. I don’t really know how to explain it in words, but like time is whatever we perceive it to be, yet there is only one set time. And I don’t know why I find it weird, but when I say something like “uh this week has gone so slowly” and they are like “it’s actually been quite quick for me”, it just sends me into a spiral and I am like “what is this world” and then I go on and on like what the actual fuck is time anyways. It is literally nothing, it is made up, yet it makes up everything, we use it for everything. We blame it for so much, like death, yet it isn’t even a thing. Time can’t kill you, but we say it does. Time isn’t anything.

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And in reality, we can’t say “time travel is impossible” because time isn’t even a thing. How can you travel in something made up? We could magically tell the world to put their clocks forward 4 hours and that is technically time travel because we moved the time forward, the thing we made for the world to live by. But the time travel that we talk about is actually just wanting to go to more developed particles. We want to see what everything looks like when particles have changed and moved. So it isn’t time we want to travel, but movement. And when they released something on the news the other day saying “scientists have found a dimension that is moving back in time”, what it really means is that it moves in a different way. I know I sound absolutely mental, but I just don’t really know how to word it but please comment below if you understand what I mean.

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But like, we say we can’t control time, yet we made it. In reality we can change time, but we can’t change the movement of the earth. We can’t speed up the development of everything around us. It is just weird to think about how this thing we all plan our day around, was made up. It’s a concept. It’s not like gravity where the world would fall apart if we didn’t have it, or that it was always there we just hadn’t named it. If time ‘disappeared’, everything would carry on. Nobody would die from it, the earth wouldn’t be blasted into a million pieces. We don’t need it to survive. Yes it’s very convenient, but imagine what life would be like if we didn’t have it. What would change? But genuinely, that is a question. So much would change, yet nothing at all would change. Maybe we would all still be judging it off of shadows or the position of the sun in the sky. Maybe society would fall apart because we can’t organise things and be ‘on time’ to things. It’s freaky how something made up, makes up everything.

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There are so many other things that I think about time. So many thins that I literally can’t describe, but hopefully somebody read this and was like “this is exactly what I think too” and it is so crazy and confusing, that it kind of makes sense. It is so complex, but so simple. It is so scary, yet so reliable. Ok, I definitely think I have gone insane, but I hope you guys are looking forward to this new series “Do you know what’s crazy” because there are so many things that we have normalised that, in reality, makes no fucking sense. Anyways, I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT

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