2 COVID Tests and a Christmas in Quarantine

12 days ’til Christmas and my true love gave to me, a big fucking mess. I mean what the actual hell. Here I am with a bit of a sore head and a stuffy nose and then I take a wee lateral flow test before I go out to Ju-Jitsu but then the 2nd line pops up faster than Borris Johnson can answer a simple question. And I just looked at it like “oh shit” (the test that is, not Borris) and I was praying that it would just be the one line at the T so that means that it was just a faulty test so I waited and eventually the line came up next to the C and then I really panicked. I have never seen the T line come up so much quicker than the C line. What a fucking joke because I was second guess what I was actually looking at. But no that bitch was setting up camp and was not gonna leave any time soon. So I took another one and the exact same thing happened. The lines were not playing today.

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The covid must have been bouncing off the fucking walls because it came up positive so fast. I was kind of planning to get positive school results but the fucking coronavirus… that’s just unnecessary. And to be honest I had never really been nervous about it before but when I got the positive result I was so scared. Not for me to be honest like I’ll get over it but just for literally ruining Christmas. I will get out of quarantine before then but we just had so many plans with family and stuff and now I am making everyone miss it. How crap is that?! If it was any other time of year, apart from summer, it would be fine but of course, it never is.

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I do sound like an ungrateful bitch because this is probably not even half as bad as it could be and I do realise that I am very lucky but I’m the first in the family that we know of so it’s just a bit scary you know and I feel bad too. I thought that being the unsocial human being I am that I would be fine, but no. So like where the fuck did I get it from? I don’t even know. I only went to school and I went babysitting for one day but the kid was asleep so I wasn’t near him and his mum was away/not near me when I was at their house. I was also at my close friend’s house on Sunday but they are all negative and I’m guessing I had it then, but like that’s lucky if none of them gets it. Here is me literally like “hOw DiD I GeT cOvId? I dIdN’t EvEn Go OuT” but then continues to list the busiest week I have had this year. That is sad for me to admit but that just shows I was never really out and about with people before.

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I have just gotten a PCR test this morning so these will have the official results and hopefully will tell me what strand it is. I don’t know why I’m so dumb, but I’m still thinking there is a chance it comes back negative. THANK FUCK if it is but literally I took 2 lateral flows and they both came back positive within seconds. I just don’t want it anymore. I want to go back for the last week of school!! I mean put me on camera and call me annaxsitar because I don’t want it.

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So yeah, I don’t really know what to do anymore and I guess I’ll keep you updated on the results but it just feels so weird how I am gonna be part of the statistics now. I have never got it or been friends with someone who got it before so it’s really different and I just wish this was just a really bad dream and that I would wake up and be like “thank fuck” because I just regret everything. I don’t even know what to regret though because I don’t know where I got it. So I guess make sure that you take regular tests and be safe. I mean I’ll be fine but just think about the others who aren’t gonna be as lucky if they get it.

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I hope you enjoy this post and please do comment below if you or anyone you know has/had covid because I’m sure there are a lot but I’m not really sure what to do at the moment. I’m lucky that I’m young and healthy so please don’t think I am being ungrateful and attention-seeking, it’s just a bit confusing at the moment but thank you so much for taking the time to read this. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT.

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Is The NHS Mental Health Service Coming To An End?

Introduction Since the 5th of July, 1948, the UK has been blessed with free healthcare through the NHS, helping to provide critical treatment and medicine for UK citizens. Included in the NHS are the mental health service with psychologists, mental health nurses and many more specialised workers who work to improve the lives of others…

My Glasses Melted In The Sauna | 2023 So Far

So it’s the middle of the 2nd day of the year and I’d say it’s been interesting, to say the least. I mean, not 2 hours ago I quite literally melted my glasses. Call me blonde, but I wore them into a sauna. In my defense, I have done that before when I had a…

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Weekly Reminder

Hello guys, so I have posted in like two days but don’t worry it was just for my birthday so didn’t really have much time, but I’m back now so we are good to go. And what a better way to get back into things than a weekly reminder you know. I don’t really have a set theme for today to be honest, but I guess I want to make it more motivational this week I suppose. But this is also coming from the least motivated person in the entire world, but I always seem to give better advice to others than I do to myself so lets get into it I suppose.

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My school makes all of the 5th years do a careers talk with a career advisor. And during mine he was asking me if I was interested in going to school next year or university. Me being the indecisive bitch I am, I said that I had always wanted to go back to school, but at the moment I don’t know because I don’t have the motivation for it and I kinda don’t know if it is for me (but that is a whole other story). And he told me that he was hearing that a lot from other people in my year, especially during quarantine. He said that our lives have completely been turned upside down and the school state of mind we had built up was completely shot down so it is understandable that we are rethinking these types of things. And that is so true you know. I mean in my most important years of school I barely studied for more than 1 hour that whole year and me being confused is normal. Nobody else has ever been through this type of thing so we, the generation who were previously fucked up, have no guidance and nobody to relate to that actually knows what we are going through. So I guess this information might be better for those wondering whether or not to go back to school, but I will tell you how you can benefit from this if you aren’t going to school or anything like that. I would also like to mention that not going back to school is completely fine and I respect that, so if somebody thinks I sounded like I was being judgmental, I wasn’t trying to be

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So now for all those who aren’t thinking about returning to school and just over all have low motivation and confusion about what their future is going to be like. I am going to start of with the cliche “it is totally ok” because honestly it is. I think that after all the shit you have gone through for over a year, or maybe more than that depending on your life, it is your right to feel like you have been knocked of the tracks of life. It takes a very strong person to be unfazed by what is going on because pretty much everything changed in the blink of an eye. I still remember the day that I came home from school and sat down with the news playing on the TV and the whole world was told that we must go into lockdown for the foreseeable future. So in that split second, what was expected to be a week off school, turned into 6 months of complete lockdown. I didn’t step back into school for 6 months and that all changed in one split second. So that is a shit load to process and we had to restart that process every time the news changed and that was literally every day. So don’t beat yourself up for not knowing what to do next. Give yourself the respect and the time you need to process what has happened and move on from there when it is right for you. Although it may seem that we are expected to bounce back from all of this like it is natural, it is totally ok for you to take the time you need to readjust. I am not sure how long that will take for you but it will happen eventually so ride out this wave and don’t try to speed up the process because that won’t be helpful for you in the long term. I guarantee you that you are not alone and I know that if you were to ask someone if they know what they are going to do next or what their future holds, no matter what stage of life they are in, the will most likely say “I have no fucking clue” and that is fine because you can figure it out together. You quite literally have your whole life to figure it out.

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I hope this helped you guys out their who feel a bit lost and unmotivated because I know that I do. I am young and still have so much ahead of me which is fucking scary, but we are in this together ok. So please feel free to comment down below how you have been feeling lately and maybe someone will reply saying they feel the same way. Like and follow for more content like this and make sure to look at my other posts which are more comedic and different to this post. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT


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Is Halloween Getting Scarier Due To Such High Fashion Expectations?

I myself am not someone with massive fashion sense. I tend to be late to the trends because I am never confident enough to fully commit to them as if I everyone would turn and point and start laughing at me like “I can’t believe she actually fell for it”. Don’t ask why, but that’s…

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I Want You All To Know…

There is something that I wanted to talk about that we all know of already, just maybe we don’t all recognise it. I want to bring it to your attention because I think it is really important to understand and be aware of.

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Lately, life has been like walking through concrete, and it is like that for a lot of us. Every step is so exhausting and sometimes you feel like you should just stop trying and let yourself get trapped in it. This whole year we have been told continuously that “everyone is going through the same thing. We aren’t alone and we know exactly how you feel”. I have to admit, I have said this a lot too and sometimes, although people say it in a supportive and positive way, it doesn’t always help. “we know exactly how you feel”. Let’s talk about that for a second. This pandemic has affected the whole world, yes. The impact of it has affected every single one of us, I know that. But nobody knows exactly how you feel. I am sure that if someone actually knew ‘exactly’ how you felt, they wouldn’t just be doing a year assembly or a one minute motivational talk before they go off teaching you about animal cells. I know that if someone where to know ‘exactly’ how you feel, they would be be doing a lot more than they are right now.

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So why did I even say that? To make you feel lonely? To make you feel weird? No. I said it because sometimes whenever we think some crazy stuff that can seem scary, and someone says it is normal, we begin to play it off and think that it is this bad for everyone. Then you might begin to feel weak because you can’t handle all the things that supposedly everyone goes through. But that isn’t true. Yes we have all been through the pandemic, but we haven’t all been through the same thoughts and trials. Not one of us have had the same emotions and same feelings and thoughts as you and I don’t think we ever will. And I want you to know that if you are struggling, then it doesn’t matter if it is normal or not because you deserve help. Even if it was normal, everyone would need help. But the truth is, the things you are going through are not normal. But that is ok, as long as you talk about it with someone. Try to figure it out with someone. People just say the whole “we know how you feel” thing as a way to show they are here for you. They don’t know a damn thing about what you are going through so don’t let what they say get to you.

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You can also see it in another way. Nobody has any clue what anyone is going through. So while you might think that you are the only one having a really difficult time, one of the loud guys at the back of the class could be depressed or have troubles of your own. The school bully could be having family problems. I mean it doesn’t excuse what they do but they life probably isn’t perfect either. This can be a bit confusing for people as well because then they think that if everyone is going through something, it is fine to struggle, but that isn’t true. It just means that more people need help. We can’t compare ourselves to others, especially when it come to mental health because we have no way of knowing how they feel and what they are going through. It is literally impossible to do that.

So I guess, to wrap up this weeks weekly reminder, just know that you don’t have to stay quiet because “everyone feels this way” because that is completely false. But also to know that you aren’t a weirdo for feeling how you feel. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT


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