I was thinking about this today and it really got me worried. I have never seen an embarrassing photo of a baby in a long time. I don’t mean in old photos, but I mean that on Instagram, the babies are always in Nike or Gucci with their hair immaculate and they never are caught in a bad moment. So why is this bad you may ask? Well, let me tell you. How the hell are these kids going to be humbled when they grow up and don’t have any embarrassing photos to look back on? Answer me that because all of their generation are gonna walk around feeling like they are absolutely perfect and, while we love self confidence, you don’t want to be a bitch about it. My generation are humbled by the fact that there are hundreds of our photos scattered around our house that could completely ruin our life. Like there are a few where, if they got into the world, I may never recover from. But they don’t have that. They voluntarily release it into the world with the caption “I woke up like this” while when I was there age I woke up with the 2 different Dora the explora pj’s and a bush of hair. And that would be a good day.
To be fair though it kind of makes us more iconic. I mean I suppose it is very embarrassing when your mum or dad whips it out one day out of the blue and shows it to every breathing thing in the street, but it’s a bit of fun. Because you know everyone else has embarrassing photos so it is fine and is quite a fun time. Like their friend group is going to be so dry because they won’t have any embarrassing or funny stories to completely die about. The most they will have is the time their mum didn’t match their Gucci handbag to their Gucci belt. It isn’t ok to be honest. They will be able to sleep at night. They won’t get that flashback every night of that embarrassing point in their life 10 years ago. The audacity.
I still get haunted by this one photo I have that is literally of 2 year old me butt naked by the side of the pool just chilling and obviously, instead of being parents and getting me changed or out of the view of others, they decided to take a bloody photo and print it out for everyone to be scared by. But again, it’s a big lol moment and I am not ashamed. At least I have a personality. At least I have the reassurance that, despite the shittness of my life, I look better than I used to. I know that I have at least evolved from that moment if nothing else. So what I looked like a crack head baby?! Who wasn’t? I think that when I have kids I will make sure they are allowed to just be kids and roam around so that I can take as many embarrassing photos as I can with great camera quality and then in the future they will be so pissed but I can look at them straight in the eyes and say with all honesty “It’s for your own good, kid”. Maybe they will hate me but at least my kid won’t into a cheeky bitch or a bully because they think they are better than anyone else.
Honestly, what will happen if they only have good baby photos? Surely that will have some affect. I mean, imagine peaking when you are a literal foetus and when you are older you know that you can never get much better than that because now instead of expensive designer clothes, you are stuck with Primark tops and sketchers. Too be fair, primark is top notch and I am sorry if I just offended it there. I will forever worship primark. But yeah, to all the parents out there with the generation I am talking about, please, for the sake of humanity and your children’s future, dress them up like unicorn barf and let them get all muddy and be like actual kids. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT
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