You see, I have been to Florida, California, Turkey, Spain and some other places and they have all been really warm. Like obviously they were roasting places, but not one of them (well, maybe Florida) roasted or toasted me like the UK does. It’s as if the sun piled up all it’s heat that is supposed to hit the UK during the year and then fucking dumps it on us for a couple of days each year. One day I’ll be in my winter quilt absolutely freezing my tits off and the other I will be sleeping in my own sweat, basically being air fried. Write now, no joke, I am sweating my ass off. Like my ass is down the street and probably in Turkey right now because I’m sweating so much. It really ain’t fun. And the fact is, we aren’t prepared for this type of weather. It only happens once every three hundred billion cups of tea. So we have no air conditioners or shit like that. No, we just fester and complain about it.
It kinda goes like this. For 360 days of the year, we complain about how cold it is and how it always rains and is fucking miserable, but then for the other 5 days of the year, when it is absolutely boiling, we complain about it being too hot. But you better fucking believe with will complain while having a great time. The day drinking will be at an all time high, which I didn’t think could get any higher in the UK, the beaches will be packed, the pasty legs will come out and we will burn and tan until our skin falls off. We will complain, but we also won’t waste it. To be fair though, at the moment I am inside on my computer, but my windows are open so that’s something. It is pretty quiet outside though but I’m guessing everyone is at the beach or doing some crazy shit because when it is sunny in the UK, nothing matters anymore. I am just happy we don’t have school at the moment because usually the sun is released as soon as our exam papers are set on our desk. That isn’t even exaggerating, like it really is like that and everyone else can back me up. Maybe the world is a bit guilty for the whole pandemic thing and is giving us some sort of … what’s the word? Hap.. Happne… oh, happiness. I almost forgot the word there lol.
The thing with me when it comes to sunny weather is that my twin sister robbed me off the ability to tan, and my eyebrows, so I literally won’t tan. I do get a few freckles tbh but like I will burn like a bitch if I get one singular ray of sun touching my skin and I instantly start pealing. What I do have though is blonde hair, so I will sacrifice everything else just to get my hair in the sun so it can go lighter. During the rest of the year, I near cry cause I think I’m going brunette (no offense I just like my blonde hair) and then in summer, like a fucking mood ring or some shit, my hair goes blonde again and we do the whole “should I put lemon in my hair to speed up the process”, which I never actual do because I don’t want to be so sticky and stuff like that. The thing is though, if you are around me on a sunny day, be prepared to have me mention how I want my hair to get lighter because of the sun as though it is some sort of medical mystery and I’m one of a kind. Literally it will go like this
THEM – “my nan just died”
ME – “well I’m gonna die if the sun doesn’t fucking lighten up my hair
THEM – “what even is life? Like how the fuck did we come to exist”
ME – “Exactly! Like how come my hair can change colour and soon it will become luxuriously blonde. It’s just crazy”
THEM – “me and your dad are getting a divorce”
ME – “It’s because my hair is browner now, isn’t it, but I swear when I go in the sun it will go blonde again, just wait a few days”
It’s a crazy life bro. But I’m gonna wrap it up here because, if you haven’t caught on, it is boiling outside and I haven’t got much time left to complain about it, burn and get my hair lighter again. Feel free to comment below if you found this relatable or if there are any other things people need to know about summer in the UK. It is crazy tbh. Don’t forget to like, follow and comment for more and I will see you again tomorrow for more. I hope you have a great day, stay safe and stay yourself PERIODT
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So I was just watching the opening ceremony or the Olympics and I’m sorry but like how awkward would that be. Especially for the people that work there and just wave as they walk down and have to act as though people are watching them but like really nobody is. And then the actual athletes … Continue reading The Olympics: Awkwardness Unlocked
To any foetus child out there who is like what the fuck are genes, basically they are the characteristics that we get from our parents and they make up who we are and what we look like. For example, I inherited my dad’s white ass Irish skin which burns like a bitch whenever a bloody … Continue reading I Hate Genes
Bitch, I don’t know much about this movie. I mean I’ve watched it and I know the general plot but like the only thing that sticks with me to this day and the phrase that every organism is aware of is when he says “mama says life is like a box a chocolates, you neve’ … Continue reading Who Else Is Pissed At Forrest Gump’s Mum?
No this is not a joke. Schools in the UK are closed. But what do we do now. How will we cope through this seemingly never ending third lock down.
To be honest, I have no clue. I mean it only clicked with me today how long away March is. I mean it is still January. Boris didn’t even promise that we would be back before Easter so I mean I don’t know what I should mentally prepare myself for. Although it sounds good out of context, ‘school shut until March’, we still have to do school from home and at this point I am like ‘well if I’m still doing school work I might as well be in school and seeing my friends.’. I am pretty sure I already made a post about lock down and what it has kind of done for teens and how we are so confused now. I mean yes there are vaccines going out, in fact my grandparents just got them today, but for some reason it still doesn’t feel like the end. Even when everyone gets the vaccine, I just can’t get it into my head that it will be over. I feel like that is only one step in a whole pile of them. It is going to be weird though, going back to school and normal life. It is weird to think that one day everything will be as it was before. No masks, no distancing, no google classroom (I hope). It will kind of be like we just got woken up after a really intense nightmare. One day we will be going on with life and then just stop when we get a wave of memory and we’ll be like ‘damn we used to have to put on a mask everyday.’. It definitely will take some time to not instantly reach for a hand sanitizer or to not go onto the road to distance from someone.
Why is this turning into a story time. Anyways. This is going to be really tough. For EVERYONE, this will be tough. But as a community we need to stick together. I know this probably sounds like the 10th motivational assembly you had in school but take it from me, a 15 year old, and not an old man with a ‘relatable’ power point behind him. People are going to deal with this in so many different ways. Maybe you will start an online business. Maybe you will start to paint. Maybe, you will create the next great dish that will change the world of food as we know it today. There was a phase in the second quarantine, which was utter crap because schools were still open’, where I had convinced myself I had just become great at art. I don’t know why but I just had the feeling. I don’t really know where I am going with this story but yeah. I think that the third times a charm so hey, something great might happen really soon that could change your life. Do something you usually wouldn’t do because you are scared of being judged because guess what? You aren’t gonna be going out and seeing those people anytime soon. Die your hair, cut your hair, try new make up, new clothes. If your bank account is up for it anyways.
What we all kind of forget whenever we get more bad news is that it isn’t always going to be this crap all the time. I mean 100 years ago they had a pandemic and they were able to recover from it, even though they didn’t have all the resources we have today. There are so many excellent and smart people out there who are trying their best to make the world better again for you, for me, for all of us. It will be hard to believe that, I know. I mean last year I was like damn I can’t wait for this to be over in a few months and go on holiday next year. Well, look at me now. As pale as the snow and with literal back issues from sitting all day. But just remember that some day in the future you will be smiling with a passport in hand, the warm sun on your face, and the feeling of possibility. New Zealand have done it already. I mean they got through it so well and although we are just taking a bit longer 😦 we will still get their. You will see your friends, you will see another day, and you will see a life without masks.
What I would love though is if everyone could comment down below something you have started that got you through lock down or something they plan to do to get you through this one. I think it would be a great reminder of how we are all going through this. It is a global pandemic and I know that nobody will be going through the exact same thing as you, but you aren’t alone. I promise. We will get through this. Subscribe to my blog and we can do this together. I try to upload everyday and please comment below if there is something you want mentioned and I will make sure to include all of them in my future posts. Lets just take this one step at a time. This pandemic ain’t gonna get the best of us.